fadinghope65

Thu, 15 May 2008 18:56:20 GMT

Turned 14 on Monday! XD
Fatty sugary cake :(

Only 8 weeks until going to Bude with school
It is an activity holiday
Will burn so many calories
Like a constant workout

But we have to go swimming every morning
Everyone in my year will see me in a swimsuit
Fat bulging out
I am going to look disgusting
And everyone will feel sick just looking at me
I am trying so so so hard
But it is not good enough
I am still fat

xx

Easter

Mon, 24 Mar 2008 10:50:44 GMT

Easter has turned into an excuse for fat pigs to stuff their faces with chocolate.

Well I am not going to be one of those fat pigs. My chocolate can stay in the kitchen and rot, because it will make me even fatter and i am going to be strong.
I mean I am not even Christian and I have got 12 eggs - I mean that is just ridiculous.

My brother Ian got 3 - he melted them down - it looked disgustin huge lumps of chocolate floatin around in it. made me feel so sick :( bt it stopd me bingin on mine!! yay XD

am going to get a shower now cause just been on a really long run. can't w8 to add up todays calories - its going to be a good day!! Alredy burned loads and its only 10 to 11!! WHOOOOP!!! right now i feel like I'm the happiest person on Earth, just knowing there is a huge pile of my chocolate in the kitchen and it is going to remain untouched.

Think thin
xx

Fri, 21 Mar 2008 22:51:37 GMT

Hey I'm new here!

Came on here because I heard about the proana communities on here, so glad i joined. People on here are great. I will loose so much more on here than on my own.

my stats:

LW : 96
CW : 108
HW : 110
Final GW: 84
Height : 5''4'
Age: 13 (14 in May)

The name - fadinghope65 - fading hope because i let my hope fade away when i stopped loosing. Last year was when I started loosing weight, almost lost a stone! but now ive put it all back on, people got suspisious and were going to tell teachers and my parents so i started eating. just in front of them at first, but once i started i couldnt stop. then i found out my dad was having an affair and ate even more. you see he moved out when i was about 9, mum and dad never divorsed, too complicated, they didn't want to split the money and my mum, she was still clinging on, i still saw him and his girlfriend , Rachel. But then he moved back in, about 2 years ago now. then last summer i was shutting down his laptop because i'd just been doing my homework on there, and there was an email from her. looked through the rest of his emails, there were 100s of them from her, i can't tell mum. it would break her. so i keep quiet. so now, now im fat. But now I will do better, I will loose more and I will not loose sight of my dream, not until im there, then i will be happy. People say I'm mad, people say I just want attention, but its simple I just want to be beautiful, thin and happy. Don't judge me, help me, help me get thin! Sorry for the life story!

xx